In this raw and hope-filled inaugural episode of the Divorced Christian Woman Podcast, my friend and fellow coach Diana and I discuss the vulnerable topic of waking up to life post-divorce. Together, we unpack the emotional rollercoaster of the first year from the quiet loneliness of taking the trash out alone to the massive internal shifts that come with reclaiming identity and power as a divorced Christian woman.

We explore the grief, grit, and growth that come in the wake of separation, and how honesty, community, and inner truth become lifelines. Whether you’re two weeks out or ten years removed, this episode reminds you that you’re not alone, and you’re going to be okay.

Key Takeaways:

• There’s no “right” way to feel after divorce. Some women celebrate. Others spiral into grief or depression. All experiences are valid.
• Beliefs will get blown apart—and that’s good. False beliefs about marriage, God, and self-worth often shatter in the aftermath, creating space for truth.
• Loneliness isn’t your enemy. Learning how to be bored, alone, and content is a superpower.
• You can relearn what you never were taught. From personal finance to setting boundaries, life after divorce is a classroom.
• You get to choose your truth. Validation no longer needs to come from churches, communities, or partners.
• You’re more resilient than you realize. Fragility and grit can coexist—and both are sacred.
• Divorce is not the end. It’s the beginning of becoming fully yourself.

Try This at Home: 

Journal through these questions:

1. What was the moment I realized my marriage—and the life I thought I was building—was truly over? How did that moment impact me emotionally, spiritually, or physically?

2. What beliefs about myself, God, or marriage have been challenged, shattered, or refined through my divorce experience? Which ones have held steady and helped me stay grounded?

3. What has surprised me about my own strength or fragility during this season of life? How have I shown up for myself in ways I didn’t know I could?

4. In what ways have I been tempted to define myself by others’ opinions—especially religious leaders, family, or friends? What would it look like to reclaim my identity based on truth and love rather than external approval?

5. If I could go back and speak to myself on day one of this divorce journey, what would I say with tenderness and confidence? What do I most need to hear today to keep moving forward?

Resources Mentioned in this episode:

• Feel like a hot mess after divorce? This 5-Day Workshop will teach you a mind-shift tool to help you learn a powerful way to manage your thoughts and emotions in order to navigate adult decisions with clarity and peace.

• Flying Higher (https://joinflyinghigher.com) is my live mentorship program for any Divorced Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
• Check out Diana’s podcast, The Renew Your Mind Podcast.
• The Money with Katie podcast
• Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief by David Kessler

Article: Life After Divorce for Christian Women: The First Year of Healing and Reclaiming Yourself

You’ve signed the papers. The dust is settling. And now you’re standing in your kitchen, staring at the garbage can, realizing… it’s up to you. You’re the one taking it to the curb now. Alone. The silence can be deafening. The new reality? Overwhelming. The first 365 days after divorce for a Christian woman can feel like being dropped into a foreign country without a map or a translator.

If you’ve found yourself post-divorce wondering, “What just happened?” you’re not alone. This moment, right here, is the messy, sacred beginning of something new.

From Wife to Woman: The Moment It Hit

For some of us, the moment hits like a wrecking ball. For others, it sneaks in quietly, over time. Diana shared how watching her children react to the news of the divorce was the moment everything changed. “There’s no going back,” she said. It was final. Painful. Real.

For me, it came during a solo weekend spent reading years of journal entries. I saw myself on those pages, crying out to be heard, to be seen. And I decided to become the woman who would listen. In that quiet space, I felt God asking me, “Natalie, are you ready to trust me?” That’s when I filed.

This is how it begins. With a whisper. A shove. A moment of truth you can’t unsee.

The Beliefs That Shattered and the Ones That Held

Divorce doesn’t just change your relationship status. It forces you to reevaluate everything you thought you knew about yourself, God, and the world.

Diana wrestled with the generational narrative of divorce as a “curse.” In her family, it seemed inevitable. And for a long time, she believed her job as a Christian woman was to break that cycle by staying married no matter the cost. But she came to realize that real change doesn’t come from white-knuckling a toxic institution. It comes from living in truth, modeling honesty and health to her children.

For me, the biggest belief to unravel was that I was a “good Christian woman.” I believed that staying married proved my spiritual credibility. But when I left, the people who once validated me—the church, the spiritual leaders—turned their backs. That’s when I realized: I had built my identity on their approval. And I was done with that. My worth doesn’t come from anyone else’s interpretation of Scripture or opinions about my life. It comes from God and the truth He plants inside of me.

Strength and Fragility: The Paradox of Growth

You might be surprised by how strong you are. Or how fragile. Probably both.

Diana described the grit it took to quit drinking years before her divorce—a resilience she didn’t even know she had. And she needed every bit of that grit to get through the end of her marriage and build a new life. I’ve had my own crash course in emotional resilience: facing rejection, public shame, and judgment… and coming out the other side standing tall. The things I thought would kill me didn’t. They made me stronger. More grounded. More me.

Relearning Life After Divorce

Here’s the truth: after divorce, you don’t just heal. You relearn. How to sit with boredom. How to manage money. How to trust yourself again.

Diana had to relearn how to handle solitude: how to sit with silence without numbing or running from it. I had to learn, for the first time, how to ask financial questions, hire professionals, and understand retirement plans. I started listening to the Money with Katie podcast and realized: I can learn this. If other humans can understand Roth IRAs, so can I.

We also both had to learn how to talk to our kids. Not in a way that bashes their dad, but in a way that models truth and emotional health. Our kids need to know what a healthy relationship looks like. And sometimes that means showing them what it doesn’t look like.

The Power of Letting Go

Healing after divorce isn’t just about starting over. It’s about letting go. Letting go of regrets. Letting go of the version of yourself that tried to survive an unhealthy relationship. Letting go of the belief that you have to have it all figured out.

Sometimes, letting go looks like walking away from a church meeting where someone tells you, “You don’t know God.” Sometimes it means refusing to accept shame that was never yours to carry. Sometimes it means standing outside in the cold, taking out the garbage, and realizing this isn’t sad anymore. It’s just life. And you’re doing it.

Making Meaning and Moving Forward

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

We’re reading the book Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief in our Flying Higher group, and one thing we’ve learned is this: pain is the event. Suffering is the story we keep telling ourselves about it. You can choose to hold on to shame and regret, or you can release it. You can even visualize handing it to God, saying, “This no longer serves me.”

There’s deep power in releasing the things that keep us stuck. That’s what sets us free.

You’re Going to Be Okay

If you could sit across from your just-divorced self and whisper one thing into her ears, what would you say?

We’d both say the same thing: You’re going to be okay.

You won’t just survive. You’ll grow. You’ll learn. You’ll laugh again. You’ll be proud of the woman you’ve become. And maybe someday you’ll even love your solitude. Or start a business. Or make new friends. Or write your story.

This isn’t the end of your story. It’s just a new beginning.

And you, dear one? You were made to fly.

Come work with me and hundreds of other divorced Christian women in Flying Higher.

And be sure to check out Diana’s podcast, Renew Your Mind, for weekly brain-rewiring magic!