In this episode of The Divorced Christian Woman Podcast, I’m joined by Diana Swillinger and accredited financial counselor and tax genius Dee Carter. 

Whether you’re DIY-ing your taxes or outsourcing to someone, this one’s for you.

Related Resources:

• Feel like a hot mess after divorce? This FREE 5-Day Workshop will teach you a mind-shift tool to help you learn a powerful way to manage your thoughts and emotions in order to navigate adult decisions with clarity and peace.
• Flying Higher (https://joinflyinghigher.com) is my live mentorship program for Christian women pursuing increased confidence in their relationships, emotional management, decision making, and self-development. Join us for live classes, coaching, Bible study, and book studies every month. Plus access to a huge library of education and coaching resources. Only $59/month. 
• Get in touch with today’s guest, Dee Carter: mdcarter1205@gmail.com
• Check out the Renew Your Mind Podcast with Diana Swillinger

Article: Tax Tips and Tricks After Divorce

If you’ve ever sat down to do your taxes post-divorce and ended up ugly crying into a pint of Halo Top while muttering, “Jesus take the W-2,” congratulations, you’re normal.

But you’re not alone. I brought in tax expert and financial counselor Dee Carter for Season 3, Episode 3 of The Divorced Christian Woman Podcast, and let me tell you, this woman brought the heat. If taxes have been giving you the cold sweats, you’re in the right place.

Can I Do My Own Taxes, or Should I Stop Kidding Myself?

You can do your own taxes. You can also give yourself a root canal with a fork, but should you?

Here’s the deal: if your tax return is as basic as a Starbucks pumpkin spice latte (single W-2, no kids, no property, no side hustle), then yes, DIY software might work for you. There are free programs on the IRS website that hold your hand.

BUT.

If you have a business, rental income, sold your marital home, or got stuck with a retirement account in the divorce? That’s not a PSL situation. That’s a triple espresso with oat milk and a shot of “what-the-heck-is-depreciation?”

Hire a pro. Seriously. Dee said it best: it’s cheaper to do it right the first time than to pay $800 to clean up a mess later. Unless your spiritual gift is reading IRS documentation for fun, outsource it.

Wait, $800 to Fix a Return? Is That Normal or Highway Robbery?

When one woman in our Flying Higher community said she was paying $800 to amend a botched DIY return, Dee’s eyebrows nearly flew off her face. That’s steep, folks.

While some tax firms charge an arm, leg, and half your sanity, Dee says a reasonable amendment is usually around a third of that cost (unless your situation is complicated).

Moral of the story? Find someone reputable, not just someone with a flashy website and an office fern. Ask questions, get a quote, and remember: “expensive” doesn’t always mean “better.”

Is It Better to File as Head of Household or Single?

Head of household is the jackpot for single moms. Why? Because it gives you a higher standard deduction and a lower tax bracket than filing as “single.”

To qualify:

• You must be unmarried (or considered unmarried),
• You must pay more than half the cost of maintaining your home,
• And a qualifying child must live with you for more than half the year.
  

You can’t just claim it because you feel like a head of household (don’t we all?). The IRS is not into your vibes. They want receipts, baby.

Can I Deduct That? What Tax Breaks Are Actually Worth Knowing?

Listen, if you’re a single mom not taking advantage of these credits, you’re basically burning money:

• Child Tax Credit (up to $2,200 per kid, adjusted for inflation)
• Additional Child Tax Credit (refundable!)
• Earned Income Tax Credit (if your income is modest)
• Education Credits (for you or your college kids)
• Child and Dependent Care Credit (up to $6K in childcare expenses)

Dee says many of these are refundable, meaning if you don’t owe taxes, you can still get cash back. Like an IRS-sponsored Starbucks run, except it’s your money.

Will I Owe Taxes on My Alimony or Child Support?

If your divorce was finalized before 2019, alimony is taxable.

If it was finalized after January 1, 2019, it’s not taxable.

Welcome to the Tax Hunger Games, where the rules change every few years and you’re never sure if you’re winning or about to get audited.

Child support, thank the heavens, is never taxable.

What About Capital Gains on the House I Sold?

If you sold the marital home, you might owe capital gains taxes. But there’s good news: if you lived there for at least two out of the last five years, you can exclude up to:

• $250K in gains if you’re single
• $500K if you’re still filing jointly (weird flex, but okay)

If you’re past that window, or you didn’t live there enough, things get trickier, and you guessed it, more expensive. Moral? Get help before you sign those closing documents or pull from your 401(k) to pay the tax man.

Can I Roll Over Retirement Accounts Without Getting Slammed?

Short answer: yes. BUT. Only if you do it correctly.

Let’s say you get a portion of your ex’s 401(k. You’ll want to roll it into a traditional IRA to avoid getting taxed like you just won the lottery.

If you roll it into a Roth IRA, you’ll owe taxes on it this year, which might be smart if you’re in a lower bracket now and want to grow it tax-free later. But don’t play the guessing game. Talk to someone who can do the math so you don’t end up funding the IRS’s next Hawaiian retreat.

Is It True I Can Adjust My Withholding Mid-Year?

Absolutely. And you probably should.

After a divorce, your filing status changes, your deductions change, your income changes, and yet most of us just keep letting our employer take out taxes like nothing happened. (Bless it.)

Log into your payroll portal, update that W-4, and tell the IRS you’re a new woman.

Is There Anything Else I Can Do to Not Totally Freak Out About Taxes?

Yes. Dee’s biggest tip? Get organized.

• Keep all your tax documents in one folder (digital or physical, doesn’t matter. Just don’t let your dog eat them).
• Track which nights your kids sleep at your house (this matters more than you’d think).
• Keep receipts for child care, donations, education, and anything that smells like a deduction.
• Use the IRS withholding calculator to avoid a surprise bill or overpaying “just in case.”

Can I Just Email Someone and Have Them Help Me?

YES. In fact, you can email Dee Carter. She’s in the Flying Higher private forum, but if you’re not a member, you can email her at mdcarter1205@gmail.com

She does tax prep, financial coaching, and has been known to create an Excel spreadsheet that will make you want to cry tears of joy (unless you’re me, in which case you’ll just cry).

Bottom Line?

You are a divorced Christian woman. You have already survived the trauma of gaslighting, manipulation, and spiritual bypassing in the name of Jesus. You can survive tax season.

Just don’t do it alone unless you’re Diana and think 40 hours of reading tax code sounds like a spa weekend (bless her beautiful nerdy heart).

Otherwise? Get help. Get smart. Get those deductions. And remember: God loves you, but the IRS still wants your money. Also, don’t forget to come work with me and hundreds of other divorced Christian women in Flying Higher. 

XOXO,

Natalie