In Season 3, Episode 8 of the Divorced Christian Woman Podcast, Natalie and Diana sit down with Diane Wallenta, a certified divorce lending specialist with 25 years in the mortgage industry. If you’re confused about whether you can afford to buy, whether you’re “too old” to get a mortgage, or whether you should just keep renting, this conversation is for you.

You’ll learn the truth about age limits, what lenders actually look at when you’re divorced, how to rebuild your credit after divorce, and why your gut instinct about your budget matters more than what you “qualify” for. Diane breaks down the numbers without the intimidation and gives you the roadmap for making the housing decision that’s right for your unique situation.

Key Takeaways:

• Why an 89-year-old man just got a 30-year mortgage (and what that means for you)
• The hidden reason renting might be your smartest financial move right now
• What loan officers don’t tell you about the “12-24 month rule” for divorced women
• The one mistake with child support payments that could tank your mortgage application
• Why the amount you “qualify” for could be a trap (and how realtors benefit from it)

Would you like to talk to Diane about your situation? You can contact her by email: dwallenta@fbst.com or phone: 612-875-7414

Related Resources:

• Feel like a hot mess after divorce? This FREE 5-Day Workshop will teach you a mind-shift tool to help you learn a powerful way to manage your thoughts and emotions in order to navigate adult decisions with clarity and peace.
• Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for Christian women pursuing increased confidence in their relationships, emotional management, decision making, and self-development. Join us for live classes, coaching, Bible study, and book studies every month. Plus access to a huge library of education and coaching resources. Only $59/month. 
• Be sure to check out Diana’s podcast, Renew Your Mind!

Article: Should I Buy a House After Divorce, or Is Renting Smarter?

If you’re divorced and trying to figure out your housing situation, you’re probably drowning in conflicting advice. Maybe you were always taught that buying is better than renting. Maybe your friends are pushing you to “get into the market.” Or maybe you’re staring at interest rates and monthly payments and wondering if you’ll ever be able to afford your own place again.

Let me start with this: there is no one-size-fits-all answer. And anyone who tells you otherwise is selling something.

Your housing decision after divorce depends on where you are financially, emotionally, and practically. Sometimes buying is the right move. Sometimes renting is the strategic choice that sets you up for long-term stability. And both options are valid.

Am I Too Old to Get a Mortgage?

Let’s clear up the biggest myth right away: there is no age limit on getting a mortgage. None. In fact, it’s against federal law for lenders to discriminate based on age.

Diane Walta, a certified divorce lending specialist with 25 years of experience, recently helped an 89-year-old man secure a 30-year mortgage so he could move out of assisted living and back into a condo. If he can do it, you can too.

So if you’re in your fifties or sixties and someone told you that lenders expect loans to be paid back by age 75, they’re wrong. You are never too old to buy a home. Period.

What Are the Real Benefits of Renting After Divorce?

Here’s something no one talks about enough: renting after divorce isn’t settling. Sometimes it’s the smartest financial move you can make.

When you rent, someone else handles the maintenance. The water heater breaks? Call the landlord. The roof needs replacing? Not your problem. The property taxes go up? Also not your problem. And when you’re freshly divorced and still figuring out your new financial reality, that freedom matters.

Renting also gives you time. Time to rebuild your credit if it’s been damaged. Time to stabilize your income if you’ve just re-entered the workforce. Time to figure out where you actually want to live without the pressure of a 30-year commitment. And time to save for a down payment while you’re not bleeding money on unexpected home repairs.

What Do Mortgage Lenders Actually Look at After Divorce?

If you’re thinking about buying, here’s what lenders care about: stable income, decent credit, and documentation. That’s it.

They want to see that you’ve been employed consistently for 12 to 24 months. If you’re working part-time or your hours vary week to week, they’ll average your income over that same time period to get a sense of stability. If you’ve just started a brand new job, you’ll probably need to wait 12 to 24 months before that income can be used for qualifying.

Child support and alimony count as income but only if you can document it. That means paper trails. Never accept cash payments from your ex. Always deposit the checks immediately, even if you don’t “need” the money that month. Keep copies of every single check in a file. Lenders need to see consistent deposits over three to six months, depending on the loan type.

If the payments are inconsistent month to month, that’s okay. There are loan types that can work with variable income. You just need to find a loan officer who knows how to navigate those options.

Can I Buy a House If My Credit Is Terrible?

Yes. But it’s going to take some time.

Credit is never fatal, and it’s never permanent. You can rebuild it. Women survive foreclosures, bankruptcies, and years of financial abuse and go on to buy homes again. But it requires a plan and usually 12 to 24 months of intentional work.

First, find someone who can help you create that plan. A good loan officer or financial advisor can look at your credit report and tell you exactly what needs to happen. Maybe it’s paying down a specific credit card. Maybe it’s disputing errors. Maybe it’s opening one new line of credit and paying it off every month for a year.

And please, avoid those companies that promise to “fix” your credit for a fee. You can’t fix credit. You can only rebuild it over time with consistent, responsible financial behavior. Save your money and find someone trustworthy who will guide you through the process without charging you a small fortune.

How Much House Can I Actually Afford?

This is where things get tricky, because what you qualify for and what you can actually afford are two very different numbers.

Lenders typically want to see that you’re spending no more than 45% of your gross income on your house payment plus long-term debt. That includes your mortgage, car payment, student loans, credit cards, and any child support you’re paying. But just because you qualify for a $300,000 house doesn’t mean you should buy one.

Here’s the hard truth: loan officers and real estate agents work on commission. The more expensive the house, the bigger their paycheck. So they have a financial incentive to push you toward the upper limit of what you qualify for.

That’s why you need to know your own number before you ever sit down with a lender. What are you actually comfortable paying every month? What happens if child support or alimony stops? Can you still make the payment? What about when the furnace dies or the roof starts leaking?

Don’t let anyone pressure you beyond your comfort zone. You’re the one who has to live with that payment every month, not them. Know your limit and stick to it.

What About Buying a House With Friends or Family?

It sounds appealing, doesn’t it? Split the costs, share the maintenance, build community. But before you sign anything, think very carefully about the worst-case scenarios.

What happens if one person can’t make their payment? What if someone wants to sell but the others don’t? What if you have different ideas about renovations, maintenance, or how to use shared spaces? Who’s responsible for the lawn? The snow removal? The repairs?

And here’s the big one: are you prepared to untangle all of that if things go south?

When you’re fresh out of a difficult marriage, the last thing you need is to recreate a complicated financial and emotional entanglement with other people. That doesn’t mean it can never work. But it does mean you need to go in with your eyes wide open, with legal agreements in place, and with the understanding that relationships change.

What If I’m Just So Scared of the Numbers?

I get it. Numbers can feel overwhelming, especially if you’ve been kept in the dark about finances during your marriage or if you’re dealing with the aftermath of financial abuse.

But numbers aren’t scary. They’re just information. They’re digits on paper or a screen. They can’t hurt you.

Looking at your numbers is how you get empowered. It’s how you figure out what you can and can’t do. It’s how you start rebuilding the life you’re going to love. And once you look, the fear starts to lose its grip.

Find someone safe who can walk you through those numbers. A loan officer who specializes in working with divorced women. A financial advisor who won’t judge your starting point. A coach who can help you face the information without shame. The numbers are just waiting for you to look at them. And when you do, you take back your power.

So What’s the Bottom Line?

You are not too old to buy a home. You are not too broken financially to rebuild. And you are not stuck renting forever if you don’t want to be.

But you also don’t have to rush into buying if it’s not the right time. Renting isn’t failure. It’s strategy. And sometimes the most empowering thing you can do is give yourself permission to wait until you’re ready.

Knowledge is power. Know your numbers. Know your options. Know your limits. And don’t let anyone push you into a decision that doesn’t feel right in your gut.

You’ve already survived one situation where you gave up your power. Don’t do it again.

If you’re a divorced Christian woman who is ready to make confident, informed decisions about her life—including her housing—join us in Flying Higher. We’ll give you the training, the coaching, and the community to help you evolve into the person who knows exactly what she wants and how to get it.XOXO,
Natalie