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How to change yourself while still stuck in an emotionally abusive marriage

How to Change Yourself While Still Stuck in an Emotionally Abusive Marriage [Episode 256]

Sometimes your circumstances are completely outside of your control, and no matter how much you may want to leave them behind you, you simply cannot. Sometimes this is the emotionally abused woman’s situation. They may want to leave, but they can’t do that today, tomorrow, or even next year. They have to stay for whatever reason. Are they doomed to a life of misery and pain? No. Absolutely not.

Diana Swillinger has some practical strategies about how you can grow while staying. You can’t fix your circumstances, but you can fix YOU. You can learn to be happy right where you’re at. Let’s do it together.

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Interrupting the Abuse Cycle

Interrupting the Abuse Cycle [Episode 255]

Have you ever gone around in circles during a conversation with someone with no hope of ever reaching any kind of resolution? The abuse cycle is just like that — a never-ending loop of tension, an explosion, and then most confusing of all, a really “good” part of the cycle where the abuser is seemingly kind.

But how do we get off of this chaotic merry-go-round? How do we interrupt the cycle? I’m glad you asked. As a former card-carrying member of the merry-go-round, I have a few ideas for you as you work towards interrupting the cycle.

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How Can I Be a Good Mom in an Emotionally Abusive Marriage?

How Can I Be a Good Mom in an Emotionally Abusive Marriage? [Episode 252]

If you’ve ever flown on a plane, you know that in case of emergency, the flight attendants always tell you to put on your own oxygen mask first before you help your kids put on theirs. Healing is the same way. We can’t help our kids heal until we heal ourselves. If we stay stuck, our kids are going to suffer right along with us.

You get the opportunity to be your kids’ biggest hero, support, and safe space. But you have to be YOUR biggest hero, support, and safe space first. Let’s learn how—together.

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A Man Who Admits to Being Abusive Asks "How Do I Fight For My Wife?"

A Man Who Admits to Being Abusive Asks “How Do I Fight For My Wife?” [Episode 210]

It’s not often that we get a listener question from a man, and less often that we actually answer it. But today’s question of, “Should I continue to hold out hope for my marriage after abusing my wife? Should I fight for my wife? And what, in your opinion, does that look like?” struck me as being a question that we could all benefit from, so I’m going to give you my honest answer and hopefully help all of the women in this community as well as this seemingly well-intentioned man.

Let’s talk about what taking responsibility looks like, why advocates and victims of emotional abuse using sarcasm and satire to make their points, how abusers who want to change and actually love their wives can do that well (hint: it isn’t by trying to stay in power and control over the wife), and why my book may help you figure out if you are in an abusive marriage.

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Help! My Husband Twists Words to Confuse Me, and I Feel Guilty and Full of Shame

Help! My Husband Twists Words to Confuse Me, and I Feel Guilty and Full of Shame [Episode 206]

Have you ever wondered what Genesis 3:16 really means? Or perhaps your abuser is accusing you of forcing him into a transactional relationship simply because you’ve set down some boundaries he doesn’t like? How do we deal with these tough questions? In this episode, Natalie answers these questions by getting into the nitty gritty of Genesis 3:16, why we can trust ourselves, how not to get hooked in our abuser’s little game, and more. Let’s get out of the guilt and shame loop together.

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