Ryan Geoge grew up with a father who abused him, a church that hurt him, and a heart that needed healing. Even after learning he wasn’t the only one being abused at the hands of his father, Ryan still found healing he desperately needed, and he’s on a mission to help others heal, tell their story, and live life to the fullest.
BILL! My friend, Bill, wrote a little comment on my site that I wanted to share with you all. It wasn’t a nice comment, but honestly, that’s what makes this episode fun! Let’s take a look at what our little gaslighting friend said and examine more closely where he got it wrong.
Once upon a time, I dared to write a letter to the pastor of a church I was attending at the time (after having been excommunicated from another church for telling the truth about my life, requesting help, and then acquiring a divorce to protect myself). In my letter, I wrote that his sermon that morning did not take into account abuse survivors’ experiences—survivors who were probably sitting in the pews that morning confused and scared about what he was preaching at them. I wanted him to hear his own words from a different perspective—a survivor’s perspective. Surely this letter wouldn’t fall on deaf ears. He was a shepherd representing Jesus, right? He loved his flock and would want to care for their hearts, right?
Wrong.
Let me read you the letter I sent him, and then let me read you his letter back. It may shock you that a “shepherd” would respond this way. It shocked me then, too, but it doesn’t shock me anymore. I’ll tell you why in today’s episode.
Today’s podcast episode features a chapter from my new book, All the Scary Little Gods. It’s an analogy I wrote several years ago when I was trying my darndest to explain my situation to people who couldn’t wrap their brains around it.
In the years since that time, I’ve heard from countless Christian women how much it helped them understand what they were going through. Today you can listen to this story as it was recorded for the Audible version of All the Scary Little Gods. I hope it helps you find clarity and hope.
And maybe even a few laughs along the way.
Have you ever been ghosted by someone? They disappeared from your life, seemingly into thin air? Have you ever been worried that God might ghost you, especially if you don’t dot your “i”s” and cross your “t’s?” Spiritual anxiety is common among Christians, and Dr. Tiffany Yecke Brooks wants to break that down with you inside her newest book, Holy Ghosted: Spiritual Anxiety, Religious Trauma, and the Language of Abuse.
“Why do you keep bringing up the past?”
“You can’t have boundaries with me. You’re my wife.”
“You’re too sensitive.”
“I said I was sorry. You need to accept that. Let’s choose to have a good day now.”
“You think you’re so perfect.”
Do these phrases sound familiar? They certainly sound familiar to me. I want to show you some ways you can combat these words your abuser throws at you, even if you’re just combating them in your own mind. You don’t even have to say anything out loud (because we all know what happens when we try to reason with an abuser/fool). You can just say these phrases I’m going to teach you in your head, and that will be enough to give you the empowerment and strength you need!
But first, let’s check out a negative review I recently received *gasp* and look to Matthew 23 to help us figure out if this reviewer is on the right track…or not.
Get the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, recommended by therapists. That chapter will help you figure out what’s going on in your marriage.
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