Learn with Natalie Archives

How Cognitive Dissonance Can Be a Sign of Healthy Growth [Episode 231]

July 11, 2023

Cognitive dissonance seems like it would be a “bad” thing, right? It can actually be a very good thing, and vital to our growth! Take a deep breath – it’s okay if you’re experiencing cognitive dissonance.

In this episode, I break down what cognitive dissonance really is, why women in emotionally abusive marriages may experience a lot of cognitive dissonance, how cognitive dissonance can help us create better, healthier thoughts, and I also share three fun illustrations of cognitive dissonance for all you listeners who love a good word picture. Ready? Let’s dive in.

Eight Steps to Getting a Divorce: Understanding the Divorce Process [Episode 219]

April 18, 2023

Have you ever considered getting a divorce, but the process is so foreign to you that you feel like shutting down when the thought crosses your mind? It can feel big, unfamiliar, and overwhelming. I want to help break it down for you in eight steps so you’ll have an overview of what it’s like and how to prepare.

Let’s talk about picking an attorney, what the paperwork might look like, how your soon-to-be-ex might respond, what mediation looks like, and more. Divorce does not have to be scary and can actually be life-saving for you and your family.

Do Marriage Intensives Work? [Episode 215]

March 21, 2023

Marriage intensives: What are they? Do they work? Are they worth the money? Can a marriage intensive change an abuser? I get these questions often, and I asked the same questions myself. In fact, I believed in marriage intensives so fully that I spent $7,500 just for a man to take pictures of my angry face and talk about his own practice and family for one-third of the time. (Need context? Me too, girl. Go listen to the episode!)

Let’s discuss whether a marriage intensive is helpful when dealing with an abusive husband, whether it helped my marriage personally, and then some things you can do without spending $7,500 to “save” your marriage. I’ve got a list. A very fun list.

Interview with My Second Husband: How We Met and Married [Episode 207]

January 24, 2023

You do NOT want to miss this episode with the guest I’ve been trying to get on the podcast for YEARS – my very own husband, Tom Hoffman.

Listen to us riff about how we reconnected decades after we had first met (he was one of my grade-school bullies!), what it was like trying to date while getting a divorce at the same time, what our wedding was like (it includes pie, fries, and kids running around everywhere), what life has been like since then, and our long-awaited honeymoon run down.

Tom has been the biggest unexpected blessing to me and to our whole family, and I’m so excited to get to share our story together for your listening entertainment (and education).

The Story About Your Family on the Bus (and a food fight)

A Story About Your Internal Family [Episode 197]

November 15, 2022

I’d like to introduce you to my friend Myrtle. She’s a backseat driver. The kind you can’t ignore.

She’s MY backseat driver. And yours. Myrtle thinks she’s the help-iest thing ever.

She’s a big reason behind many of our behavior patterns. The places and ways we’re stuck. Our self-sabotage. Myrtle is the explanation for a lot of our recurrent fears. She’s loud, proud, and she never shuts up. She provides the same old thoughts that plague us, day after day, year after year.

What do we do with Myrtle? (Not to mention the bus full of other backseat drivers, in this case, younger versions of yourself.)

It starts with realizing there are “no bad parts” in us, including Myrtle. I’ll tell you all about it in this episode, one of five upcoming sessions featured in the Flying Free program.

Why Self-Leadership is More Effective Than Being Held Accountable [Episode 191]

October 4, 2022

How do you feel about accountability? Like it, love it, want some more of it?

Or maybe it’s like medicine to you — icky but necessary.

Hold on to your booty, cause I’ve got an opinion on it too.

I think it’s a made-up practice that got a “virtue” sticker slapped on it. I think it arrests our development into emotional adulthood. In fact, I’d say accountability does more harm than good.

And it can never match the power of internal motivation for true, lasting life change.

Category: Learn with Natalie