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Category: Healing from Spiritual Abuse

Is Your Church Safe?

Is Your Church Safe?

Ryan Geoge grew up with a father who abused him, a church that hurt him, and a heart that needed healing. Even after learning he wasn’t the only one being abused at the hands of his father, Ryan still found healing he desperately needed, and he’s on a mission to help others heal, tell their story, and live life to the fullest.

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How to Reframe and Recover From an Abusive Sermon

How to Reframe and Recover From an Abusive Sermon

Once upon a time, I dared to write a letter to the pastor of a church I was attending at the time (after having been excommunicated from another church for telling the truth about my life, requesting help, and then acquiring a divorce to protect myself). In my letter, I wrote that his sermon that morning did not take into account abuse survivors’ experiences—survivors who were probably sitting in the pews that morning confused and scared about what he was preaching at them. I wanted him to hear his own words from a different perspective—a survivor’s perspective. Surely this letter wouldn’t fall on deaf ears. He was a shepherd representing Jesus, right? He loved his flock and would want to care for their hearts, right?

Wrong.

Let me read you the letter I sent him, and then let me read you his letter back. It may shock you that a “shepherd” would respond this way. It shocked me then, too, but it doesn’t shock me anymore. I’ll tell you why in today’s episode.

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Holy Ghosted: Spiritual Anxiety and Religious Trauma

Holy Ghosted: Spiritual Anxiety and Religious Trauma [Episode 271]

Have you ever been ghosted by someone? They disappeared from your life, seemingly into thin air? Have you ever been worried that God might ghost you, especially if you don’t dot your “i”s” and cross your “t’s?” Spiritual anxiety is common among Christians, and Dr. Tiffany Yecke Brooks wants to break that down with you inside her newest book, Holy Ghosted: Spiritual Anxiety, Religious Trauma, and the Language of Abuse​.

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Reframing Nasty Things People Say to Victims

Reframing Nasty Things People Say to Victims [Episode 270]

“Why do you keep bringing up the past?”

“You can’t have boundaries with me. You’re my wife.”

“You’re too sensitive.”

“I said I was sorry. You need to accept that. Let’s choose to have a good day now.”

“You think you’re so perfect.”

Do these phrases sound familiar? They certainly sound familiar to me. I want to show you some ways you can combat these words your abuser throws at you, even if you’re just combating them in your own mind. You don’t even have to say anything out loud (because we all know what happens when we try to reason with an abuser/fool). You can just say these phrases I’m going to teach you in your head, and that will be enough to give you the empowerment and strength you need!

But first, let’s check out a negative review I recently received *gasp* and look to Matthew 23 to help us figure out if this reviewer is on the right track…or not.

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Do Marriage Intensives Help to Heal Abusive Marriages?

Do Marriage Intensives Help to Heal Abusive Marriages? [Episode 269]

Gretchen Baskerville joins me in today’s episode to talk about a survey she recently conducted on peoples’ personal experiences with marriage intensives. In her survey of 330 people, what she found was shocking, fascinating, and not at all what she expected (mostly).

Listen to today’s episode to find out the twelve biggest surprises in this survey and what they mean when it comes to the effectiveness of expensive marriage intensives. Each surprise gets more and more fascinating as the episode unravels – you won’t want to miss this!

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Excommunication Series: Janet's Story

Excommunication Series: Janet’s Story [Episode 267]

Have you ever been told you are incorrigible? Or how about contumacious, which means stubbornly and willfully disobedient to authority? Janet’s church promised to help and protect her, but when she decided to set a boundary to protect herself by divorcing her abuser, they turned on her with this vicious name-calling.

Sort of like her abuser, come to think of it.

In this final episode of our excommunication series, Janet outlines her story of waking up to abuse, seeking help from her church, and receiving a proverbial beating in return. Let’s unmask these particular wolves in Janet’s story so that we can learn how to unmask others in our own lives and in the lives of the people we care about.

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